Showing posts from 2008

Separated At Birth?

Politicians and murderers, six of one, half a dozen of another? For those who have forgotten, the guy beside Rod Blagojevich is "Preppie Killer" Robert Chambers. Now 41 years old, he's a fuck-up too, just like Rod.

How Sweet It Is

I filled up my tank tonight for less than $14.

Hope They Were Craftsman

I’ve been messing up at work, but at least I didn’t lose a $100,000 tool bag. Heidi Stefanyshyn-Piper is in T-R-O-U-B-L-E!!! Want to see the liberated space tool container? Check out the following link for local viewing times near you.

It Came To Her In a Dream!

I was at my brother’s house today, and his mother-in-law said she had a weird dream. She dreamed that the whole bailout and financial disaster we’re facing was all a hoax.
Wouldn’t it be wacky if it were?

A Creepy Feeling

The other day I was doing some cleaning. I dusted off the piano and picked up the urn that my mother’s ashes were in. For some reason, I didn’t think the ashes were in there. I was examining the urn, discovering the top had been sealed on. Of course, in sitcoms and movies, the urns AREN’T sealed, causing some gross, but hilarious moments. Well, anyway, I didn’t expect the ashes to be in the urn, and I turned it upside down. The ashes that I didn’t think were in there suddenly let loose from the bottom, since they hadn’t been disturbed in probably four years. They fell in what seemed like a big lump against the top of the urn, and it gave me the creepiest feeling ever.
Shortly after that, I had nightmares that my mom was dying again. Sorry mom, for disturbing your peace. Or pieces, as it were.

One Reason Why I Don't Answer My Phone

I’m a little bit sick and tired of not meeting better people. I feel sometimes like I’m surrounded by seriously mental people out to make me miserable. I get criticized for turning the ringer off on my phone and not having my cell phone on. I do it to get peace and quiet. Lately, I’ve wanted to get in my car and drive off. I swear, in the next couple of months, I’m going to treat myself to a weekend away.
Anyway, a former friend is calling me. It’s a hell of a long story, but this is what went down.
This friend supposedly wanted help from me because she had recently adopted a puppy, and was in over her head. She claimed the dog was wild, but she wasn’t. She was just a puppy who needed interaction, training and a yard to run in. My friend had claimed there was a hole in the fence and the yard wasn’t safe to run in. My friend wanted me to take care of her puppy while she went away for a Christmas weekend. She left her kid with her parents while she went off with her boyfriend. I went out …


I turned on the television today and saw John McGauley saying that perhaps the rest of the condo project at Harrison Square should be scrapped and perhaps an Imax theater built instead.

Hmmm… seems to me I heard about some woman running for city council last year who had some interesting ideas for downtown, one of which was an Imax theater, and perhaps unique retail, such as stores that don’t currently exist in Fort Wayne, like Crate and Barrel, Ikea, and Dave and Buster’s.

Oh wait. That woman was me.

Despite one of my critics dismissing me as a “foul-mouthed lunatic” (at first I was angry, but then I was flattered, I am who I am, after all) I’m glad that a local person, AND a Republican, realized that building overpriced condos in a city known for cheap real estate, was a mistake. I couldn’t foresee the collapse of the housing market, and I’m not really smart when it comes to money, but even I know in a city where you can get an actual house with a front and back yard for less than $100…
I went to a friend’s costume party Friday night and went as Sarah Palin. I won “Most Original,” even though my friend didn’t have a designated prize for that category, which she didn’t come up with. I think her mom did. The thing on my shoulder is Zeus, my Beanie Baby moose.

My friend also went all out on decorations, including her porch. However, the scariest thing on her porch, as pointed out by another guest, was the mail in her mailbox.

DST and the YouTube Video

I remembered the time change Saturday, but then I promptly forgot about it, even though I think I was up at 2 a.m. and could have changed my clocks right on time. Instead, I completely forgot about it. I called Robert Sunday after he got off work, but he didn’t answer. Turns out instead of calling him a few minutes after 5 p.m., I’d called him a few minutes after 4. He called and reminded me about the change. So I changed my clocks. Damn this DST. It’s going to screw me up forever, the same way our garbage pickup day changed and messed me up.

On another note, the previous link is for a YouTube video Robert and I made, with some help from Jeanette Jaquish and Paula Brandt, who also appear in the video. It’s a parody of political debates, with stereotypes of Republican, Democrat and Green candidates.

Now Showing on YouTube

Yet Another Misspelled sign

I see misspelled signs all the time and it really gets on my nerves. Why do people think bad spelling is acceptable? With Spell Check and dictionaries readily available, stuff like this shouldn’t happen, especially if you are running a business and want to look professional.

An Observation

I’ve come to the conclusion that “high quality laminate flooring” is an oxymoron.


It was nice seeing you again, Beth. Thanks for reading!

Zeit Dafür Schadenfreude!

Almost three years ago, I got to meet the Barenaked Ladies. At the time, I was a huge fan. I won a contest, which is how I got to meet them. I have to say that they were not so thrilled about having to meet fans that night. After three minutes with them, I really did want a hole to open up and swallow me. They just weren’t in the mood to talk, and I suspect by the odor that was in the basement hallway, my presence might have interrupted their dinner. It took me months to get over the disappointment I felt. I stopped listening to their music after that night. I had been on fan boards for weeks before I met them, asking others what to expect, and everyone was like, “oh they’re great, you’ll have a fun time, blah, blah, blah.” Well, it didn’t turn out that way at all and I was devastated. Anyway, for some reason, I got online the other night and looked up Ed Robertson and Steven Page on Wikipedia. I found out that Robertson was involved in a plane crash (he survived) but the money shot w…

For The Record

Because these things sometimes get out of control, I want people to know that I did NOT have anything to go with Jill Long-Thompson’s commercial where she’s walking in front of dump trucks. Dan “Angry White Boy” Turkette posted on his blog that I must have been a consultant on the commercial. I want to make it clear I was NOT. I don’t know why the inages of Jill Long-Thompson plus dump trucks made Dan think of me, but whatever. I’ve never driven a dump truck.

I'm Back

After deleting my blog in a fit of rage, I've decided to come back.