New Restaurant For Downtown Fort Wayne
Coming to downtown Fort Wayne just in time for the opening of Harrison Square is Peckers, a restaurant catering to female sports fans. “Pecker Boys” will wear yellow Speedos and serve chicken planks, fries, and will offer “lite” fare for sporty ladies looking to watch their weight.
A spokesperson for Peckers says Fort Wayne is an “ideal” location for the new fast food chain, a feminist response to Hooters.
“If women agree to serve food to fat guys too chicken to walk into a strip club, and are willing to work for $2.33 an hour plus tips, we figure we can find men who are willing to wear skimpy swimsuits and do basically the same thing.”
The spokesperson admitted that because of the Peckers philosophy of finding comely, fit men to be Pecker Boys, the entire Fort Wayne staff was imported from more physically fit areas of the country, like Southern California.
“If Hooters doesn’t have fat-ass, ugly women, we feel we shouldn’t have fat-ass, ugly guys,” said the spokesperson. “These men are indeed servers, but they are sex objects as well. We want the ladies of Fort Wayne to be confident they will have quality food brought to them by handsome, fit men, unlike the guys they are married to.”
The spokesperson expects more Peckers to spring up over northeast Indiana in the next three years.