Monday, May 29, 2017

Memorial Day

I just fished cheese out of my cleavage.
Classy.

Wednesday, May 10, 2017

Monday, May 1, 2017

Closure

Therapy for childhood trauma: Thousands.

Being terrified of men thanks to abuse: Loss of self-esteem, depression, suicidal thoughts, no meaningful relationships with men, loneliness.

Finding out one of your worst abusers from middle school/high school threw himself in front of a semi truck?

Priceless.

Sunday, April 30, 2017

Carroll High School Fine Arts Night Art Display Ideas Plus Photos From 2014


This post is obviously a reprint from Monday, April 28, 2014. I'm running it again because this years Fine Arts Night is coming up! If you or your classmates need display ideas, hopefully this will get you started!


Carroll High School Fine Arts Night Display Ideas!

It's that time of year again! No, not prom season--it's awards and recognition season, and once again, it's Carroll High School's turn. Check out Carroll's Fine Arts Night Wednesday, May 10, at 7 p.m. at 3701 Carroll Road, Fort Wayne IN.

I work at a big box home improvement store. Sunday, I had two young ladies and their parents come in trying to figure out an inexpensive way to display artwork. Face it, even if mom and dad say it's okay to blow $200 on a one-time only display, why would you want to? If you ARE going to spend money, it makes sense that whatever materials you decide to use, you can use again.

So here are some ideas for displays. I realize time is short, but I decided to put some ideas together. If you like them, spread the word!

CARDBOARD IS KEY!
For an impressive display, get your hands on a refrigerator box. If you can't find one, try and get a couple of range/dryer/washer/dishwasher boxes and paint them the color(s) you want, then tape them together. You'll have at least four sides, and a fairly tall display. You can weigh the boxes down with books for extra stability. Try and find boxes with flaps intact. I would suggest going to the home improvement/appliance stores in person to get the boxes. If you call the store, chances are you will be transferred to a department staffed by one person. They will probably be busy, perhaps too busy to look and see if there are any boxes to be had. If you actually show UP in the store, you stand a better chance that someone will track down some boxes for you. Cardboard is cheap (in this case, probably free) and is fairly lightweight. Be sure to use cardboard to mount your artwork on instead of buying expensive mats at the art stores. I think they still sell Post It note glue sticks, or some sort of adhesive that isn't permanent. Use that, or make corners for your artwork for temporary mounting.

Painting your cardboard: You will have better results if you use a primer. You don't want any printing on the box to show through. So if you are going with a black or red background, chose a gray primer.

USE WHAT YOU HAVE!
Try and think of unconventional ways to display your artwork. A patio umbrella makes a novel way to hang artwork, as long as you have a sturdy base for it. Use fishing line and duct tape to attach the artwork so it can hang from the umbrella's outside edge. No one will see the duct tape since it will be on the top of the umbrella. Make sure the umbrella is high enough so people can walk under it.

Bookcases can serve a dual purpose of displaying 3-D artwork, such as sculpture or jewelry, and you can use the three sides to display photos or paintings. Remember to mount your prints on cardboard, and don't frame them, so they aren't heavy. If you don't have a bookcase, look for inexpensive ones such as these. You can use them over again, and to save space when you aren't using them, they are easy to take apart.

If you don't have it, see if you can borrow it. If you have lots of jewelry to display, try using a dress form, and putting a cool dress or neat outfit on it. It depends on your jewelry. Funky, modern jewelry won't look right on a formal gown.  Also consider hitting up the thrift stores for velvet jackets to use as cushions for pins. If you have satin gloves, try stuffing them with fiberfill and stitching them shut. You can use those to display rings and bracelets. Scarves would work too. Try using goldfish bowls or aquariums to display jewelry.

Wire shelving, the kind used for linen closets, comes in various depths. With some zip ties, you can attach three or more of them together and form a vertical triangle, or a cube. The wire is usually spaced in half-inch intervals, so you can attach a variety of things. Most stores can cut the length of the shelving. We have it in four, six, eight and twelve foot lengths. You can get one shelf for around $7 or so. Larger sizes cost more.

Something else you might want to consider is lattice panels. You can use zip ties at the top as a hinge, then either use more zip ties at the bottom, or twine to secure the bottoms to make a sort of giant sandwich board. It will look like a giant upside down V. You can then display your artwork on both sides. You can then use the lattice for its original intention, or use it for a garden-themed headboard or wall display panel for photos or award ribbons. 

Pallets can also be used, if you don't want your artwork at eye level. You can zip tie pallets together to make an open cube about three and a half feet high. This might not be your cup of tea, but pallets can be had for cheap, if not free.

Go scavenging! People throw out all sorts of useful stuff. If you can find four doors all the same size, you can paint them. then hinge them together for a vertical rectangle (which will be pretty darn solid) for a variation on the refrigerator box theme. Screen doors are a lightweight alternative to traditional doors. I've seen brand-new screen doors for $21. But try to borrow or scavenge if you can.

If there aren't any boxes to be had, you can always go to Office Depot and get document storage boxes. I think they come in 10 packs, so you can save some money. You can paint these, duct tape them together, and make a giant wall to display your artwork.

Most home improvement stores have sawhorse brackets for about $7 per pair. A couple of two by four by 96 inch studs cut down can make a quick table. Just slap a piece of sturdy cardboard on top, and some fabric to hide the legs and you're good to go. you can also make a giant sawhorse by buying five of the two by fours, and a pair of brackets. The fifth two by four will go across the top. You will have a sparse looking frame, which can be painted whatever color you'd like. You can hang the pictures with fishing line, or clear line. Duct tape the line to the back of your artwork. Then, duct tape the line to the top of the two by four across the top, where no one can see it. The artwork will appear to float in the air. 

Use your imagination! A lot of great artists were extremely poor before they became famous. Use this opportunity for making a display another way to be creative! Bear in mind, I don't know if you have space limitations, or how much time you are allowed to spend assembling you display. Not all of these ideas may work. Think about your artwork and if there is a theme running through it. If you need a little bit of elevation, borrow a card table or coffee table. Check out the thrifts for sheets or lengths of material to cover tops of tables, table legs, etc. Stepladders may be an option as well. You could probably make a 10 foot by 10 foot display booth out of PVC pipe. Depending on the circumference of the pipe, I saw pipe for less than $2. You could attach it with the little corner pieces. I would estimate if you did just the frame, it might run you maybe $25. Also, if you have one of those little pop-up canopies, you could use that as a display area. If it's advertising beer or some other form of alcohol, you may have to cover up the logo so you don't get in trouble.

A little bit about paint: It never hurts to prime! If you are using cardboard, it probably will have writing on it, or it won't be the right color. If you are deciding on a very dark color like black or a deep red or brown, please use a primer. If you don't, the brown or white of the cardboard may show through, and you won't be happy. If you come to Lowe's, you can get a gallon of black paint for about $21. It's called Olympic Icon, and I recommend getting it in flat, so it doesn't reflect light. I suggest using the color Black Magic, which is my favorite shade of black. It's made by Olympic. It's a pure black; if you look at our other shades of black, you'll see hints of green, purple and even brown. If you do decide to prime, get the Valspar High Hiding Primer, which is around $18 a gallon. It's white to begin with, so tell someone at the paint desk you'd like it tinted to a gray.

If you think these ideas are helpful, please let me know! My email is GloriaDcolumnist@aol.com. Please spread the word, and if you try something that works, please let me know! I will find out the date of the Fine Arts night and post it here on the blog. I just wanted to get this post up ASAP. Please spread the word if you know a Carroll student (and parents!) freaking out over displays! 

Carroll Fine Arts Night Photos!

Here are some photos from Carroll's Fine Arts Night. There was some really interesting funny art. There were also spoken word pieces, singing and music as well. I really do think the night should be longer than just a two hour event. I was able to meet the young ladies who came to Lowe's looking for display ideas and paint. 



This was a nice set up, and some nice pieces. The display was three panels painted and hinged together, with a board across the top to keep everything stable, as well as identify the artist.



Taylor made a cast of her own body in packing tape, and made a dress form. Displayed on this is a dress she made, and yes, she can wear it.

Some nice graphic design work.


Noah got these pallets from church for basically nothing. He nailed some panels on the backs of the pallets to give them height. He then nailed some supports on the bottom so the panels wouldn't fall over. He said to buy the pallets, they would cost about $9 each. He then mounted his photos on some unusual nails that sort of looked like flattened spikes. They fit in really well with his photographs, which featured lots of bridges.

This display was made of what looked like OSB and PVC pipe. Ashley's work depicted a father and son doing the same things.


Brooke was one of the young ladies who came to Lowe's looking for paint. She chose this dark red color, and I strongly suggested she use some gray primer on her panels before putting the red on. Red does not cover well, so I think the gray primer helped. Brooke said she put on about two coats of the red. It looked really nice!

Tayler knew someone who had a prior Fine Arts night exhibit, and borrowed this set up, which consisted of old doors. Tayler can't remember where her friend got them, but said they weren't expensive. The doors looked antique, and made a beautiful background to her work.

Alexa is the second young lady who came with her parents looking for display ideas. The boards were painted black and then hinged together to make a big display triangle. Boards can range from insulation to OSB to particle board to plywood. I think her father said the set up cost around $103.

Alana's artwork struck me as having a sense of humor. You'll see a close-up photo of her stuff later.


Brianna spoke about being Asian, and how it puts a damper on the holidays. However, she portrayed it in a humorous way.

And Santa doesn't come for Christmas, either. Sorry the pictures are sideways.



Coming to Starbucks soon. The Megaccino. Only $200.

A whole table of wire-sculpted shoes was set up. Here are a couple of them.


Yes, a replica of that famous picture, with soldiers made out of packing tape.

Made out of Starburst wrappers.

It looks like Obama, but it isn't.

I like how this figurine was multitasking.

This student liked underwater photography.

I like the title on this one.

This caught my eye, because it looks like a miniature replica of the area surrounding Cindy's Diner downtown. Then I realized it wasn't. It's a photograph, and there must be something up with either the lens, or how it was manipulated (if it was).

This is plastic, painted and then glued into place.

I like abstract art.

A 3-D depiction of the Wizard of Oz.

These bowls looked like flowers to me.

I like art that makes me think and/or wonder. Is this a tooth, or a white diamond?


Bird leaves!
Or are they leaf birds?


A branch makes for an interesting display tool.

I like this apple stitched together. It was disturbing.


I love the colors in this. This was done by Brooke Stabler.

The picture above was painted in nail polish! Alexa Heyneman did this one.

This photographer had photo reproductions of famous photos as part of his display.

I think this was the artist, Josiah Joseph, posing as Elvis.


Some of Alana's work. I like her sense of humor!

Kate Yeager had some disturbing-looking work. Her display was literally a miniature art gallery, complete with walls and lights.

This was a really wonderful show. And it was absolutely free! Next year, consider coming out to this show to see and hear some very talented students!


Saturday, April 29, 2017

At Least I'm Laughing


Okay, these are from a Buzzfeed article called 18 Memes You'll Relate to if You're Not a Chill Girl at all. At Least I'm laughing, and after last night, that's good.

Friday, April 28, 2017

Thank You

Thank you universe, for letting me live long enough to see my worst enemy walk through hell.

Tuesday, April 18, 2017

Well, Hello Officer!

Today before class, an IPFW police officer spoke to me about some stuff I'd written on Facebook.

Maybe it's time to stop sharing.

Monday, April 3, 2017

So I Guess I'm Screwed

Twice in the past few months, I've heard men talking about certain women who thought they were "all that" but weren't. I've also heard men like confident women, but it seems that women are not allowed to have self-confidence unless they look like supermodels. So, I can only have self-confidence if I'm perfectly gorgeous. Got it. But if I'm just my ordinary self, I can't have self-confidence, because I'm not pretty enough to have it.

That's why cosmetic, cosmetic surgery and the diet industries are booming. It's another reason why women are interested in fashion (which is also booming). If you can't be beautiful, you can be stylish.

I would have killed to be this pretty in high school. It's really kind of horrifying to see this examples too frequently. Here's a ten year old who killed herself. Here's another one who killed herself, and even though she's dead, the bullies STILL hate her. I'm just floored by these beautiful girls being told they're ugly. I mean, Jesus Christ, how perfect do you have to be? Is it jealousy on the bullies' part? Or are they just shitty enough human beings, who will probably live long, successful lives while the bullied end it all, because they're just fucking tired of being a punching bag for assholes? How many of these poor kids who kill themselves could have really contributed something good to the world?

People are remarkably chill about the issue of bullying with some of them saying, "stiff upper lip," "suck it up," "just ignore them" and other stupidly optimistic advice options.

I'm damaged. I'm trying to become undamaged, but it's hard. I'm thinking it's impossible. So I try and do things that make me happy. But I still have to live in society. I'll never be good enough, pretty enough, or smart enough, and for those reasons, it's hard to keep trying. It's why I spend a lot of time by myself. I don't have to worry about mean people. Because if I stand up for myself against these people, I'm a horrible person. If I don't stand up against these people, I'm seen as a doormat. I never really learned to be gently assertive, so when I do stand up for myself, I'm over the top bitchy, but at least people know where I stand.


Saturday, March 25, 2017

Guess the Gender

A customer insulted me  and then flipped me off. Care to guess the gender?

Saturday, March 18, 2017

Yesterday, men were unusually nice to me. Holding the elevator door, waving at me from 30 feet away, etc. I wish I could say it's because I smiled more, or brought St. Patrick’s Day-themed brownies and handed them out.

It wasn't that at all. Men who barely acknowledge my presence were chatting me up. I had one guy I was making paint for walk around to the tinters and watched me make the paint.

It wasn't because of a suddenly improved attitude. I had the same expression on my face as usual and the same concerns.

The only difference was that I was wearing this shirt.

I usually don't wear shirts like this. I chose it because it was green and comfortable.

However, it depresses me to realize I am nothing more,than just a pair of tits. I wore one of my usual shirts today. My co-worker who chatted me up yesterday didn’t acknowledge me today. This is why, when I mixed paint, no one observed me.

Men, this is why women get breast enhancement. It's why we cut ourselves up, starve, and realize nothing we achieve will impress you. For you, it's all about the rack.

Ironic that all I had to do to get these was basically double my body weight.

I wish I could force men to wear their current bank Statements around their necks. That way, women would know if your net worth is worth taking to.

Hurts doesn't it? It's totally unfair. Yeah, I know.

Monday, March 13, 2017

Wait...WHAT?

Men were especially nice to me today.

Is this God's way of telling me I'm going to die soon?


Profiles of the Gods, and My Snarky Responses to Them, Because I'm Dead Inside

I stopped subscribing to the dating websites, because, well, no one sounded interesting enough to date, except for that one guy who was way younger than I am who never called me back after I beat his ass three times at miniature golf. Plus, it was a waste of money. But maybe I'll pony up some more money eventually so I can make another edition of I Care What I Look Like and So Should You.

Remember, these are actual dating profiles and my snarky responses to them. Boys made fun of me and bullied me for years, I figure it's time to turn the tables on these idiots who now have receding hairlines, baldness, crow's feet, and worn-out bodies. How does it feel, assholes? Not only do I have more hair than you do, but I have way more energy, and even though I'm dead inside, I didn't waste the best years of my life married to some asshole, pumping out kids I couldn't afford to raise once the asshole left me. Yes, guys, because you find me repulsive, I don't have to worry about a college fund for my non-existent kids. I can spend my money on me! I can buy that skateboard and learn how to ride it! I don't go complaining that I'm "too old for this shit anymore." I enjoy my super-human immune system which allows me to hang around sick people and not get sick! Jealous much? GOOD!

So here's some recent winners:

I am a crusty old fart with messy hair, bad breath, smelly feet, and nasty BO. I'm grouchy and bad manners.

My god, this is almost every single fucking guy I ever went out with! Keyword: ALMOST Enjoy being alone--you deserve it.

just trying this to be honest. looking forward to adding onto my life and maybe things working out for a change.

Or maybe not.

I'm honest, loyal and a God fearing man with morals and integrity.

When men make it a point to mention they are "God fearing" with "morals and integrity" it usually means the opposite. Zero points for the sunglasses and facial hair. That smacks of, "I don't want my wife to recognize me/I'm too lazy to snap a new picture."

I love extreme sports outdoor activities lake life motorcycling and quiet romantic evenings an some dancing music spending time with family an someone who is always there for me felling close bond fires

His name is Fire. Bond Fire.

single 50 u r old who knows how to treat a lady loyal sense of humor n has lots of love to share with the right lady!!!

U R Old??? How dare you tell me I'm old! You're older than I am. Dick.

Life is to short not to be happy. I lost my 11 year old son to cancer in 2007 and have had a hard time trying to be happy.

Your son's dead. Hurry up and be happy. Because, you know, life is too short. Also, take the shades off and shave that damn facial hair!

Intelligent, Committed, Confident and Honest~ Update- I am officially in Goshen
Well, geez, being in Goshen is nothing to brag about, really.

truly able to enjoy good times & keep smiling in bad; things always get better

I guess you've never been the victim of a situation that DIDN'T get better! I.e, a one night stand that turned into a pregnancy, a date that turned into a date rape, etc.

It has taken me a while to understand the concept of work/life balance and to accept the Fort Wayne area as my home...

Resistance is futile. One of us, one of us ... Expect your IQ to plummet, your waistline to expand, and your wardrobe to become shitty.

willfully identifies and explores all the amazing gifts of the unexplained. OR Otherwise known as, an urban professional, hippie, metrosexual, dork, jock, nerd /monk.

This reminds me of a joke I heard once. A little boy says to his mom, "when I grow up, I want to be a drummer." His mom says, "you can't be both."

Man, it is tough to describe yourself!!!

No it isn't. I'm a creative, talented, damaged bitch. See? That wasn't hard at all!

I am a glass half full guy i laugh and joke around a lot i am very affectionate and passionate man.I am also totally honest person i am looking for a women with some commen interest that would like to get to know eachother and c where it goes!

He writes like a slutty 12-year-old.

I've spent the last three years recovering from a severe ankle issue. I love my daughter, she's seven. I live in the country and don't like going to the cities that often.

Obviously, he majored in non-sequitur.

i have a great son who i love to death.

Anytime someone writes the words "to death" in a dating profile, I always get a little bit scared. Also, it's "whom I love to death." Not "who."


I an just checking to are what is going on in the dating world

Terrible spelling, for starters.

fun loving person fun loving, very romantic, very caring, sence of houmer Love farming,love and romance

See previous response.

I am NOT a game player, so if you are a game player, do not respond to this

What have you got against bowling, Monopoly, Candyland, and World of Warcraft??? Dick.


Tuesday, February 21, 2017

Happy Birthday Mom. I love you and miss you.