EdgeofGloria

This video is a humorous look at how to make traditional graduation ceremonies fun to watch. This is Carroll High School's Class of 2012 that got nailed on this one. Enjoy! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=foqm6588PhM

I woke up around eight or so today. I usually don't wake up that early. I couldn't get to sleep, and I didn't get to sleep until after four a.m., so I wasn't planning to stay up. But that wind! I had my window open and I looked out to a continual wind that was coming from the northeast, then seemed to change direction, without slowing down. I closed my window a bit and went back to sleep. I had an appointment at noon, so I woke up a bit later, and didn't think much of the wind. I drove out to Jefferson Pointe, then decided to go back into town through West Central. Holy Shitstorm! It looked like a hurricane/tornado/typhoon had struck. I took several pictures of the destruction. Feast your eyes! I am tired of the term "stormnado" so I am calling it Hurricane Saturday, since that's what it felt like and that's what day it was on. I didn't have to go into work until later, so I went out and got storm pictures. I wasn't the only ...

Today I stood up for a fellow former classmate on our high school class Facebook page, and was told by yet another fellow former classmate, "no wonder no one liked you in high school." Dear Mark Z. You are the reason I love and hate Facebook. Thank you and fuck you very much. In other news, I just may have written a proposal for my first indie film. Ah, fuck it, Class is over. Time to celebrate. Too much drama today from a person I don't even know. And that's a huge reason why I never attended the reunions until five years ago. With classmates like these, I really didn't need any enemies. But not all of them were like that...you know who you are... :)

I had an idea for a possible experiment. I ran into a former classmate at the Cinema Center, and ran the idea by her. She writes a 'zine, and said it could make for a good article. "Do it!" She said. "Just don't get murdered." I don't plan on it, but if I did, that would make for a damn good cautionary tale, wouldn't it?

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=95hVHDP4-Mk This is a commercial for fake medicine. Enjoy!

One of my co-workers told me about a day where our department was swamped and it was very busy in the store. Someone at the front desk decided to yell over to our department instead of getting on the phone. He yelled, "hey, do we have any big black caulk in a tube?" A nanosecond later, he realized what he'd said. "You should have seen his face," said my co-worker. But I laughed so hard at the "big black caulk" in a tube comment. Because it sounded like "big black cock in a tube" and I laughed so hard, I nearly started crying and almost peed my pants. Strange how I can enjoy a gamut of emotions literally within hours of each other.

"There's a writer named Kilgore Trout." "There is ?" Trout looked foolish and dazed. "You never heard of him?" Trout shook his head. "Nobody--nobody ever did." *  *  * Billy helped Trout deliver his newspapers, driving him from house to house in the Cadillac. Billy was the responsible one, finding the houses, checking them off. Trout's mind was blown. He had never met a fan before, and Billy was such an avid fan. Avid fans are the BEST. I know...because I have one. :) The first commenter to correctly identify the novel this quote came from and the author and the elementary school I went to AND the kindergarten teacher I had gets a free autographed copy of my first collection of short stories, which includes at least one science-fictiony type story. I don't ask for much, I just ask for what I want .

I had two customers pronounce "wash" like "warsh." I always die a little inside when I hear that.

So I bopped down the auditorium steps of the Cinema Center, resplendent in my Chicago Blackhawks jersey, and my professor turned to me and said, "now you're talkin'."  Because I was presenting on Darren Aronofsky's Pi , I brought cherry pies for everyone, which went over very well. It's been a while since I've been up in front of a class talking about something I find interesting, and I really enjoyed it. I prepared additional material because I suspected I would be the only one presenting. I talked about how the film looked: it's very contrasty, and one of the articles I read said the film is not really in black and white, it's in black OR white. Which is pretty accurate. I said the black and white approach to the film helped the viewer feel more like he or she was in Max's world. He's obsessed with finding a number that will unlock the meaning of the world, especially the stock market. I took some pictures of a stop sign and fireplug in...

a couple nights ago. We were getting ready to leave some building when I hugged her and said "don't worry, you'll get another modeling contract." She didn't seem too concerned about it, but, she IS Janice Dickinson. When I had surgery in spring of 2013, I loaded up with library books. It was bliss to be able to spend weeks lying in bed reading. A couple of the books I got during that time was No Lifeguard on Duty: The Accidental Life of the World's First Supermodel , by Janice Dickinson. I felt like she and I could relate to a certain extent. At the time she was struggling to be a model in an industry full of blue-eyed blondes, I was in elementary school coveting the blonde locks of my schoolmates. One classmate in particular (I think this was in kindergarten) had hair long enough to sit on. It seemed like if I got a doll for a gift, it was invariably blonde with blue eyes. I learned from an early age that it seemed to be a blue-eyed blonde type of world, an...

I found out my film professor is a Chicago Blackhawks fan. So guess who just happens to have a 'hawks jersey in her closet? I'm washing that sucker and wearing it tomorrow, with a completely innocent expression on my face. I'll do almost ANYTHING to make the professor like me as a person. Except wear a Boston Red Sox jersey.

I found my Hello Kitty diary. I think I bought it when I went with my parents to Puerto Rico on their 25th anniversary trip. I even remember the name of the mall where I bought it: Plaza Las Americas . Anyway, names have been changed to protect the guilty. Wait--fuck that. January 13, 1980 Dear Diary, Cary Bellis hit me in the head again, in block. I don't know how much longer I can go on. I thought Northwood was going to be new and exciting but it isn't.

I am going to try and post on a regular basis. It's not for lack of material--I have kept a journal every day since August, 2003. I also have random posts from when I was fresh out of college (the first time) as well as the depressing observations from high school. I could post a picture a day from all the prints I have and probably not run out of material for at least two years. Why don't I post every day? I don't know. I know some bloggers do it. My friend Heidi  posts every day, and I'm not sure she would identify herself as a writer . I sort of do identify as a writer. So what's my damn problem? I'm not sure. Sometimes I worry about falling into a rut. So I'm going to try and post a better variety of stuff, maybe make some "theme" days, so people might know what to expect. But isn't the fun of following a blog NOT knowing what to expect? Anyway, I make videos. I've got 47 up there, which means I need to make five more in order to...

Another rejection slip. This time it was from Narrative magazine.

Five years ago I went to my first class reunion. I was not popular, or pretty, or an academic whiz. I was picked on a lot, mostly for my receding chin. There really wasn't any money to fix it when I was a kid, and even if there had been, I'm thinking my mom wouldn't have done it. Throughout life, I'd saved money for the procedure, but something always happened to the money. I needed a car repair, or something. I had good intentions, but something always came up. The only time I ever had real money in my life, I should have had it done. However, that was after my mother had died, and I had been out of work for nearly a year. I had no idea how long it would take me to get a job, and I was worried about spending that kind of money. When I think back, I didn't even think about getting my chin surgery done. My brother was being an asshole, and I had to find work. And the procedure got put off for several more years. But, earlier this year, I'd won a settlement from...